she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
