I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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