Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
