You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
