he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
ya dads aren't the best wingmen
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I just got carded by a ten year old.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
