i barfeds in our rink
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
Randomize