somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
