WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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