Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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