Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
