My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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