theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
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