12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Randomize
