Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize
