Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Randomize
