you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
