She went from zero to smokin in five shots
i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
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