Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
