I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
