As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
