Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
