her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize
