The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Randomize
