she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
