This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
