can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
