New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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