Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
this will be a night to untag.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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