I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
