was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
