if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
