i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
I would ride that face into the sunset
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
