have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
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