I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
