I just cut my nipple shaving
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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