is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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