i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
Randomize
