chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
