My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
