Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
