We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
