I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize
