I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
