Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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