try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Randomize
