He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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