I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
