I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I can't breathe out the right side of my face
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
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