can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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