fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
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